Green grass

Friday morning, another student admitted to being afraid of me for some time because of my height. However, the turning point for her came a couple of weeks ago when she saw me wearing a Peanuts cartoon bandage on my elbow. So the images of Charlie Brown and Lucy did it for her.

Last week was quite busy, not so much because of work, but because I have spent more time with various activities with students and friends. This included dinner with a German gentleman I met last month while visiting Sarang Church. He's married to a Korean, and we had an interesting conversation about Korean culture from a Western perspective. Of course it's all getting old, but we still had a good time. JeaDo and I met in Chungmuro and after lunch at a Chinese restaurant, he took me to Namsan Park. Located on top of one of the many mountains upon which Seoul is built, it offers a spectacular view of the city, even on a hazy day. Sang Yoon took me to a violin/piano recital at a local performing arts center. I'm not generally a fan of classical music, but this was one of the most intense musical performances I'd ever seen.

I also ate lunch Tuesday with a couple of more students, which I always enjoy. Many students that invite me out to eat end up paying for me. That's always a cool thing.

Friday Won Jo, another student, took me to Yoido Park, which I had heard about but not yet visited. It was a beautiful, sunny afternoon and around lunch time, so there were many businesspeople walking around or relaxing. There were also many children, apparently on day trips. One child pointed at me and said: "Michael Jordan." It was very cute. Won Jo and I sat on a bench and had a long conversation about language learning and other things. This was one of the more enjoyable experiences of the week for me. He recently spent 10 months in the United States and it shows in his English skills although he, like many of my students, tends to be self-deprecating when it comes to his skill. He actually told me that he envied me because I was a native speaker. I have heard this remark from more than one student, and it always amazes me. I envy some of my students for being bilingual, which to some extent I am but not in the way I'd like to be. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, ha ha.

Won Jo agreed to make me some MP3s of him speaking in Korean that I can listen to for practice. I am looking forward to receiving these.

Yesterday I began taking a course at church called "Missions Perspectives." The accompanying textbook, "Worldwide Perspectives," has been a heavy read, but I'm enjoying it greatly and learning about my purpose here. I will write more about this later.

I have been spending a lot of time by the Han River, and I have returned to Seonyudo Park at least three times. The fall weather has held out for a little while, and I'm enjoying as much as I can. Today I'm headed that way again to read he "Perspectives" book and play some guitar.

A couple of pics.

What am I doing here?

The Han River (and the Yanghwa area) has become one of my favorite places to hang out. The autumn in Seoul is gorgeous, and I have been trying to enjoy it as much as I can before it starts getting colder. Last night I enjoyed a long walk along the river, but this time I decided to walk north instead of south. People's stares have, for now, become less irritating and more amusing, so I really was able to enjoy myself. Eventually I came to the Seonyugyo pedestrian bridge, which I might have bypassed if not for the fact that it was buzzing with people. I crossed this bridge to a small island containing Seonyudo Park. I think I can say without exaggeration that it was one of the most beautiful parks I have ever seen in my life. With it being so close to where I live, I plan to return there as much as I can. Because it was nighttime, many of the visual details were obscured, despite most parts of the park being fairly well lit. I am looking forward to seeing it in the daytime, and I hope to post a few pictures of it on this blog soon.

One of my students threw me a curve ball Friday morning. After we went through a reading passage in conversation class, I proceeded to go through the "language points" list of 10 or so vocabulary words before breaking them into pairs for discussion of a topic. One of my students stopped me and told me that the vocabulary list was not neessary because she knew most of the words. This comment surprised me, because teachers at my school are supposed to go through as many of the language points as possible. I didn't even do all of them at first, but now I've made a habit of trying to go through all of them quickly but thoroughly, which means that sometimes I will use three or four examples to reinforce the meaning of a word or expression. This comment also surprised me because in my performance evaulations from last month, many of my students gave me good overall ratings but felt that my classes didn't follow the curriculum closely enough.

Of course, the most obvious reason for me doing the language points is that not everyone understands all of the words. And unfortunately, when I ask a class if there are words they don't understand, people are often slow to respond if they respond at all. Yet it is obvious that they don't understand everything. This behavior is largely due to the face-saving element of Korean culture. I don't mind skipping the language points if I feel that the students understand all or most of the words. However, this is not always the case. After the student's comment, I asked the rest of the class (about seven or eight students) if they agreed with this remark and they all responded yes. I then said: "OK, if you guys don't need me to go over all of these, I can just narrow it down to the ones people don't understand. Are there any terms on this list you don't understand?" There was an awkward silence for a few seconds, then everyone began to laugh.

The whole experience was disorienting (and a little frustrating) for me, but it has helped me to better understand the highly technical approach that many Koreans take with their study of English. The positive element here that after having encouraged my students for the last couple of weeks to give me feedback, they are beginning to respond. But sometimes it's difficult to figure out exactly what they want.

I have mentioned on this blog how I occasionally wonder what I am doing, in South Korea and in my life in general. Last Wednesday I had one of my more intense moments. Shortly after waking up I began to wonder: "What in the world am I doing here?" By the afternoon, I felt as if I was going to snap emotionally. Sang Yoon and I went to a traditional Korean restaurant, the kind where patrons take off their shoes and sit on the floor. I have really come to enjoy this, despite the fact that sitting cross-legged has never been easy for me. As we chatted, outwardly I was calm but inside I was screaming. As an English teacher and foreigner that is closely watched by locals, I can't wear my emotions on my sleeve as easily as I could back home.

I think one of the reasons Sang Yoon and I have hit it off so well is that we are both Christians. Though our backgrounds and, to some extent, worldviews are radically different, there are some areas where we can relate as if we've known each other for years. I told him that sometimes I wonder, "What am I doing here?" Sang Yoon gave me a response that would help get me through the rest of the day and the rest of the week. He said: "I know how you feel. I asked myself the same thing when I studied in Japan."

Please understand us

Although I'm working fewer hours this month, I am just as busy as last month. There are two main reasons for this. One is that I have been taking advantage of much of my free time to study Korean and, thankfully, I am seeing some progress. It will probably be at least two or three months before I attempt a basic conversation. My knowledge remains limited to phrases such as "How are you," "Do you have milk," "What is your name," "I want [insert unpronounceable restaurant dish here]," "I am an American," "I want a green tea frappuccino," and the like. However, Korean sentence structure has taken on a new coherence for me, which is very exciting. In some ways, it is similar to Tagalog. My limited knowledge of that language has actually helped me greatly with the Korean. I know that my progress is the result of intensive study and a method that linguist Barry Farber calls the "multiple track attack"--receiving language input from multiple sources. For me, this includes a handful of textbooks and audio CDs. In his "Linguist" book, Steve Kaufmann's Mandarin Chinese study was quite aggressive--perhaps even maniacal by some standards. I have been trying to do the same with Korean insofar as it doesn't interfere with my work or other responsibilities. It's a work in progress. I often set unrealistic daily goals for myself that I don't meet.

The other reason is that I am now taking care of much of my administrative stuff for classes early. I am proud of myself for this and I hope you are proud of me as well.

My classes are going well this month. In one of my conversation classes, a number of the students (some of them a little older) are either involved in mass communication or education. It's exciting to have communication majors there, since I studied journalism. And having teachers there (at least two or three of them are teachers) is a humbling experience for me. I have always had a great deal of respect for teachers.

Sometimes we as Westerners tend to think of foreigners as "extras"--people that only serve to fill the backdrop. Many of my students have strong passions, diverse interests and lofty, sometimes unrealistic, expectations. Yoon Young is a fan of classical music and although his major is very scientific, he has a strong creative streak and has done Web design. A sweet young girl in another class told me that she was a fan of heavy metal music, and expressed disappointment at not being able to attend a local Metallica concert because of work commitments. An older student of mine is a businessman and has given me some fascinating insights into Korean corporate culture. Monday night I'm scheduled to meet another young girl and her friend for a mock job interview in English. She is treating me to dinner. People buying me food is always pretty cool.

I have really been impressed with many of my students, for better and for worse. Some are lazy and undisciplined. Some will apologetically but bluntly admit that they missed a class because they got drunk at a party the night before. Some are only there because their parents have forced them to be there, and they can hardly hide their indifference to the class. Some are accomplished visual artists. Many are wonderful, highly intelligent people. The only reason I am in a classroom in front of these people is that I am a native speaker of English and they aren't.

My school's recruiting director encouraged me in a recent e-mail to think more critically about the students, and I have been learning to do this. This includes checking up on students with attendance problems. This also means being more receptive to their suggestions and expectations.

The staring here from Koreans is relentless, and it is becoming slightly less amusing and slightly more uncomfortable. Sunday night after church I took the subway east to go walking along the Han River, which for me serves as a nice substitute for the riverside walkway at Battery Park City. It was a beautiful fall evening, and it was the first time in a long time I was able to take a relaxing walk in some kind of park area. But there were many people walking or biking around, and the amount of looks people gave me was ridiculous. It was unsettling.

I shared this with Sang Yoon over lunch today. He told me in his broken English that Koreans are "one blood" and have had little contact with foreigners. Therefore, "please understand us."

Me in concert, kind of

Thought you all might like to watch a couple of video clips of me singing at church recently. Sorry, no Korean...

"Beautiful"
http://myiwe.com/iTV/?type=3%20PM%20Worship&id=688&action=display

"All I Need to Know"
http://myiwe.com/iTV/?type=10%20AM%20Worship&id=687&action=display

On both pages, click "Offering Music," and be patient if it takes a minute to download. It seems to be working on most computers.

For those that are wondering, "All I Need to Know" is an original. "Beautiful" is a Vineyard UK jam written by Sam Lane. One of my all-time songs to sing.

Sorry to scare you

OK, OK, OK, I'm updating my blog now--for those of who have reminded me that I haven't done so for a few days. (Sorry, Mom.)

Last week was significantly slower. This was a good thing, as I was grateful for a chance to breathe. Thursday was the last day of class for the August semester. Typically teachers take their students to a cafe (usually the Starbucks next door) or a restaurant. I went to the Starbucks with two different groups of students. Both times I drank an extremely overpriced green tea frappucino. One of my students paid for the first one, which made the second less painful.

I mentioned in a previous post how I was surprised at the opennness with which some of my students speak under the right circumstances. One of my writing students admitted to being afraid of me at the beginning of the semester. Ha ha. Not the first time I've gotten a comment like this. What's funny is that comments like these are not limited to Koreans. I've been hearing this for years from people who have gotten to know me. They tell me the truth once they're comfortable enough to tell me so. Recently I've become friends with Sang Yoon, a Korean who teaches Japanese at my school. (There are Japanese classes in addition to the English classes.) Sang Yoon's English is quite broken. A conversation with Sang Yoon is often a humorous case study in improvised communication on his part and mine. However, over dinner last Wednesday he was able to tell me, in so many words, that his initial impression of me was that I was, surprise of all surprises, "angry."

I'm sorry that my appearance scares people. Fortunately, there is hope. One of my students sent me the following e-mail (which I have edited a little bit):

"First of all, I really enjoyed your class this month. Thank you! :) You are so gentle and a nice teacher. I'm sure that you will have a good time in Korea as an English teacher.^-^ I'm a Christian and I was very proud of you in our class. You were very nice to all, you showed a sincere christian to us. I was impressed with you. I wanna have a great influence as a Christian like you!"

I make it a point not to preach at students in the classroom, because I'd rather people see my faith through my example. What encourages me with this note is that people can see that in me.

Right now I'm listening to the live, piano-only version of "Life Worth Living" off of Antonio Neal's MySpace page. It is absolutely incredible. I will be upset if he doesn't make it available to buy someday.